Sashe 238

Page 76 ......Naunauyen ajiyar zuciya ammi ta sauke kana ta janyo karamar stood din mirrow ta zauna ,tana fuskantar su'ad dake zaune tana sake dannen kukunta, gbdy ammi kallonta take tarasa abinda ke mata dadi arayuwarta akan damuwar da su'ad ke ciki. A dan fusace ammi tace " me ya miki kike kuka ? wani irin bugu gaban su'ad yayi da karfi daga bisani kirjinta yashiga dukan uku uku nan take tashiga kokuwa da numfashinta dake barazanar daukewa sannan ahankali tashiga girgizawa ammi kai ala'mun Babu komai . " To kukan me na sameki kina yi dazakice babu komai ? "yanzu mamana bazaki koyi dauriya akan yaron nan ba ,domin ki tsira da rayuwarki da lafiyar abinda kike dauke dashi, ke kenan kullun cikin zubda hawaye akan abdul ,ahalin yanzu abdul bai san halin da kike ciki ba, bai san damuwarki akansa ba asalima ba kece agabansa , dan me ke zaki zauna kina wahalar da kanki tare da kokari kashe kanki akansa. ...? "rayuwar nan fa dakike ganinta wani lokacin idan abubuwa sukawa mutun tsanani dole mutun ya killace kansa akan kowace irin damuwa ce. hawayen da take kokarin meidawa ne suka samu nasarar gangarowa bisa kuncinta cikin sauri tashiga gogewa wasu na sake gangarowa . "Bansan meyasa kike son kashe kanki da abinda ke cikinki akansa ba alhalin shi yana can yana rayuwarsa da wata..? ammi takarasa maganar tana furzar da iska me zafi daga bakinta kana ta Mike tashiga jan zanin gadon tana sake shimfid'awa domin samun inda zata d'aura hakarkarinta ganin hakan yasa su'ad mikewa tsaye da sauri takoma inda ammi ta tashi ta zauna tana tacigaba da kukanta . ammi ta dakatar da abinda take ta d'an dubeta zuciyarta na mata wani irin suya a game da halin datake ganin su'ad din cikin wanda kuma duk abdul ne silar damuwarta, batare tayi magana ba cike da kunar rai tacigaba da abinda take gbdy canza zanin gadon tayi dan duk ya 'baci sannan tashige bayi . yayinda su'ad ta mike ta koma ta haye saman gadon tayi kwanciyata lamo tare da kamkame jikinta wani irin son mijinta ne ke sake ratsa ko ina ajikinta . munamman kewarsa da kulawarsa gareta tsumammiyar soyayyarsa daya koya mata har tayi muguwar sabo dashi volue din kukanta take son karawa dan rage radadin dake makale atsokar dake kirjinta ,amman tana gudun damuwar da zata shafi ammi adalilinta. Dan ammi zata iya muzgunawa abdul akanta matsawar tana ganinta cikin tashin hankali, ita kuma abinda bataso kenan, bata qaunar abinda zai sake tunzira zuciyarsa akanta wani irin matsancin so take masa wanda batasan lokacin daya shigeta ba har ammi ta dawo d'akin bacci bai samu nasarar d'aukarta ba tana jin motsin hawowar ammi saman gadon ta rage sautin kukanta tare da goge hawayen idanunta. amman hakan bai hana ammi ganin abinda take ba ,daidai inda fuskarta ke kallo tazo ta zauna tana dubanta hade da kamo hannuta cikin nata "me kike tinani kuma a daidai wannan lokacin daya kamata ace bacci kikeyi ? Kafin su'ad tayi yunkurin cewa wani abu ammi ta sake jiho mata wata tmbyr "ki gaya min abinda wancan yaron mara tausayi yayi miki kike kuka haka ? "Na lura keda abdul kuna bukatar rayuwata "kina Sane da abinda doctor yace ba'ason mace me juna biyu tana yawon tinani da sawa ranta damuwa dayawa amman ke kullun cikin damuwa kike akan mutumkn da bai san kima da darajar ki ba ,"idan kuka bari damuwarku ta kasheni shikenan kun huta ai .... a d'an zabure su'ad ta mike zaune daga kwance datake suna fuskatar juna da ammi yayinda hawayen idanunta suka shiga xubowa sharrrrrrrrr........ " meye kuma abun tsananta kuka daga magana "kiyi hakuri ammi nasan damuwata na damunki ina kukan ne saboda an cuceni an cuci rayuwata an rabani da mijina alhalin yanasona, bansan yadda zan misalta miki yadda nakeji ba, ammi ki taba zuciyata kiji yadda take bugawa tayi mgnr tare da kai hannuta ta kamo hannu ammi ta d'aura daidai saitin zuciyarta dake wani irin bugawa tamkar ana buga mata guduma, tabbas ammi taji kokawar da zuciyar keyi amman bata yadda zatayi gurin raba zuciyar da damuwa , addua dai ce kuma tana kanyita babu dare babu rana kuma tasan ubangijinta baxai barta haka ba batare daya duba lamarinta ba. cikin murya me cike rudanin rayuwa su'ad tacigaba da mgn "bansa me zanyi abubuwa su dawo min daidai ba kamar da? " ammi Abdul nasona fiyye da tinaninki ya nuna min so da kauna tattare da kulawa alokacin daya tafi koria dani "ammi ni kad'ai nasan irin soyayyarsa gareni shi kansa ya tsincin kansa cikin wannan rayuwar ne me cike da duhun da kunci ," ammi Abdul bai san abubuwan dake faruwa dashi ba, sannan bai san abinda yake aikata wa ba a halin yanzu an rigada an rufe masa zuciya da idanunwansa . "ammi ammi !!! ki daina ganin laifinsa sannan ki dai jin zafinsa dan ya kawo kansa gareni , yaya zanyi da rayuwata? " banida yadda zanyi zuwansa ta wannan hanyar shima wani cigaba ne garemu "dan girman Allah ammi ki daina jin haushinsa ko ganin laifinsa ni dai kicigaba da mana adduar da kikeyi akan lamarina dashi, "dan ni har yanzu ina jin son mijina ba kuma zan iya bazantar da lamuransa ba... " sai dai idan abubuwan dake faruwa suka cigaba da faruwa bana tinanin zuciyar dake kirjina zata cigaba da baguwa ......" kiyi hakuri ammi ki daina ganin laifinsa takarasa fadar haka na xubda wasu zafafan hawaye hade da rike hannun ammi gam tana jin tamkar hannun ak ne acikin nata , ammi batasan sanda ta rungumeta gbdy ajikinta ba tana me tausayawa rayuwarta . "ayanayin yadda rayuwarta tazomata cike da rudanin yaci ace zuwa yanzu tasamu y'anci tana cikin farinciki da jin dad'in rayuwa. ahankali tashiga bubbuga bayanta "kukan ya isa haka ni daman bana fushi dashi sai dai banason yana kara miki damuwa akan wanda kike ciki ,"sannan ban hanaki ji da lamuransa ba amman ki koyi boye damuwarki akansa cikin murya me cike da raunin tace "ammi ki taimakeni Abdul ya dawo gareni shine kawai farincikina ,ki daina damuwa mamana matukar ina raye bazaki taba rasashi ba sannan baxaki ta'bata kasancewa cikin bakicikinsa ba kuma Inshaallahu abdul zai dawo gareki da izinin Allah addu'au saiful mu'hmin addua itace takobin mu'hmini muna addur, kuma na saka manyan malamai na addin su tayamu gayawa Allah ina tabbatar miki komai me ake nufinsa dashi sai ya zamo labari. sosai ammi ta dinga rarrashinta dagaya mata maganganu masu dadi da sanyaya rai har tasoma bacci ajikin ammi cike da samun 'kwarin ggwiwar dawowar mijinta gareta. Bangaren abdulkabir kuwa a matukar galabaice yakarsa gida zuciyarsa na hasko masa fuskar su'ad amatsayin abar sonshi ,"to meyasa abubuwa dake faruwa tsakaninsu yake faruwa? yayiwa kansa tmbyr yana shafa sumar kansa, gbdy dimaucewa yayi take kirjinsa yasoma bugawa, yashiga zagaye dakin yana son tuno abubuwan da Suka gabata atsakaninsa daita amman ya kasa tina komai abu daya ne ya kasa shudewa acikin brain dinsa matsayinta na matarsa amman sauran abubuwa gbdy ya manta komai , "ahankali ya wurgawa 'kwal'kwaluwarsa tmby "what's wrong with my brain ? sannan yakamo lips dinshi na kasa yana cizawa ahankali ahankali ya dauki lokaci me tsawo yana shawagi acikin dakin sannan yashiga wanka ya fito yasanya kayan bacci ya kwanta akan bed dinshi tare da runtse mayatattun idanunsa gam ahankali ya janyo laulausar bargo ya lullube jikinsa yana sake zurfa tinaninsa akanta kafin wani lokaci zuciyarsa tashiga hasko masa zeey amatsayin tauraruwarsa mafi soyuwa acikin zuciyarsa . Washegari ma haka ce ta kasance tare dashi, zeey ta hanashi kanta ko dan romacing din datake bari suyi kin yarda tayi haka yasa ya kama hanyar gidan ammi cikin rashin sa'a ya iske ammi zaune a parlour'n byn ya gaisheta ya nufi hanyar d'akinta "kai ammin ta dakatar dashi ya tsaya cak batare da juyo ba dan yasan dashi take "zo ka wuce banson damuwa da tashin hankali, "kwanciyar hankali muke so arayuwarmu zuwanka baya tsinana mana komai face damuwa da tashin hankali dan haka out ta nuna masa hanyar fita da hannunta..... haka ya juyo jiki a sanyaye ya koma gida cike da matsananciyar sha'awarta dake sake taso masa . daren ranar sam kasa runtsawa yayi kwana yayi yana watsawa jikinsa ruwa da kyar yasamu ya runtsa sakamakon wani irin feelings din daya dinga taso masa from know where, hannuwansa duka yasa ya dafe daidai joystick dinsa dake harbawa yana juyi akan bed . Washegari da sassafe ya bar gidan byn yayi shirin xuwa office ,sai dai kai tsaye gidan ammi ya nufa cikin rashin sa'a ya iske basu bude part din ba ,haka ya wuce office zaune yake a office dinsa aiki yayi masa yawa duk saka hannu dayake cikin file's din dake gabansa daidai yake da bugun zuciyarsa cikin haka kiran zeey yashigo wayarsa batare daya tsaida abinda yake yi ba ya dauki wayar ya manna a kunnensa babu gaisuwa balle tamyarsa yanayin aikinsa kawai ta hau masa zance kamfaninsa dayace zai mallaka mata tayi masa. yayi shiru yana sauraronta har sanda ta dasa aya amman still bai ce mata komai ba sai tinanin daya lula ,lshi dai yasan kamfanin su'ad yayi niyyar mallakawa tun suna koria bai san abinda ya shiga cikin tinaninsa ya furta ya mallakamata shi ba . Jin shirun yayi yawa yasa tashiga kiran" hello hello kana kan layi kuwa ? "Uhm yayi gyaran murya" "kayi shiru ko ka fasa bani ne ? tayi maganr a tsawa ce wanda yasa yayi saurin cewa " no ke nake jira idan ki tashi sai muje nagabatar dake ..... "ok na d'auka ko canza maid dinka ne . "ina ni ina canza ra'ayi a duk abinda kika ce shi ne kawai. "ok sannan takatse kiran tabarshi zaune cikin tinani da wasi wasin zuciya. Cikin kankani lokaci zeey tazama taxi no garaje wannan ya dauka yabawa wannan dan duk wanda taji ya tsarga mata sai ta nemishi ga xuciyar matasan yanxu tazama abunda tazama kadan daga cikinsu ne keda tsoron Allah. " tabiya su makudan kudi taji dadin rayuwarta sannan ga bukatar karfafa akin bokanta akan abdul. ,har zuwa wannan lokacin wani abu bai shiga tsakaninta da Abdul ba kullun