Sashe 10

dawainiya dake. Likita yace ki maida hankalinki wajen shan magani cikin lokaci, in sha Allah sati daya yayi yawa za kiji dadin jikinki”. Safiyyah ta gyada kai. Sai nurse din ta bata maganinta na dare. Sannan tayi musu sallama ta fita, bayan tace inda wani abu shi Zayyan ya kirata. Dakin sai ya koma wani irin tsit, bayan fitar nurse din. Zayyan ya yada kansa bisa kafadarsa akan kujera yana zaune bisa kujera kwaya daya dake dakin, wadda ke fuskantar Safiyyah dake kwance. Ko ya tambayeta ya akayi ya tsintota a Kura? Ko ina kika je a Daka tsalle? Kawai yaja bakinsa yayi shiru. Ita kadai ta gane cewa ‘silent anger’ ne a kwance kan fuskarsa ma’abociyar kwantaccen saje da gargasa, kuma ‘silent punishment’ dinsa na shiru dinnan da yafi komai kidimata yauma yake son yi mata. Daga baya Zayyan sai ya lumshe idanunsa yana sauraron kukanta, har barci yayi awon gaba da ita. A washegari ma haka ta wuni kuka, sikuma ya wuni zaune gabanta silently. Sallah kadai ke fiddashi masallacin asibitin. Su Anti Dije sai yamma suka zo musu ranar za’a kai amarya Ni’ima gidanta kenan, washegari su Sabah kuma zasu koma Dandume. Har magriba suna tare dasu sai bayan isha suka tafi. Bayan sun tafi again zata cigaba da kuka ya bar mata dakin, bai dawo ba sai da ya tabbatar tayi barci. Washegari aka sallamesu suka tattaro suka kamo hanyar Abuja, ko gidan Anti Dije basu koma ba, sai a waya ya gaya mata sun wuce. Tayi addu’ar su sauka lafiya. Sun wuce Kaduna sosai amma ba umh ba umh umh tsakaninsu. Sai ta kukan a fili tana so ya kulata, at least ya tambayeta daga ina kike Sophie mana? Yadda zata samu gangara tayi masa bayani. Amma mutumin saima ya hade giran sama dana kasa yana tukinsa hankalinsa kwance, ransa a bace, hankalinsa ya dauku sosai ga tukin da yakeyi. Data tabbatar Zayyan bazai kulata ba kuma bashi da niyyar hakan, sai ta soma magana cikin rishin kuka. “Kayi hakuri, kayi hakuri Habiby, ka dubi halin da nake ciki ka gafarta min. Wanda ba komai ya janyomin ba sai rashin jin maganarka, da rashin daukar nasiharka, kace inyi tawakkali amma na kasa. Ka yarda koma ina naje, kuma kowanne irin hadari na sanya kaina ciki, sannan na hadu da wannan tsautsayin duk ya faru dani a dalilin son mu rayu tare ne, da son samun ‘ya’ya daga gareka, da son cigaba da rayuwa da kai cikin kwanciyar hankali da soyayyar mahaifiyarka data ‘yan uwanka dana rasa, kwadayina kullum yana ga samun tsatso daga gareka Habiby!”. Tayi shiru kadan tana kallon yadda yake sake hade girar sama data kasa, tana son gane ko bayaninta yayi wani tasiri? Sai bata gane komai ba. Sophie ta gyara kwanciyarta a gefen damansa, jikinta duk ya mata tsami, ta fuskanceshi sosai cikin damuwa da zafin ciwo, fuskarta kan tafukan hannunta tace “wallahi Habiby…..” sai tayi shiru, ta kasa karasawa ta kuma saka kuka, ganin yau Habiby ko alamun gezau ya ki yi da damuwarta, balle yayi alamun zai karbi rauninta da tubanta. Sai a lokacin zuciyar Zayyan ta dan fara russuna, yace “Umh? Ina jinki Sophie, kin shirya magana yanzun? Ko na kara miki lokaci ki kara deciding me zaki gayamin? Bana son ki takurawa kanki sai kin yimin wani bayani. Bana cikin damuwa kuma banida matsala akan hakan”. Da sauri tace “na shirya zan gaya maka gaskiya tsakanina da Allah, amma don Allah kayi hakuri…” ai kawai sai in’inar ta taho mata gabadaya ta sarqe ta, dama in bata cikin nutsuwa sai ka nutsu sosai zaka gane me take cewa in tana magana in’inar bakidaya afkowa take yi. Amma da yake Zayyan da Safiyya sai Allah duk abunda take fada ya gane tsab, bashi da matsala ko kadan da in’inarta, dadima take masa, nan ta fara bashi labarin zuwanta gurin Dr. Hadizah, da haduwarta da Ammara, da zuwansu gurin Tsimbirbira la’ananne. Haka kawai yaji zuciyarshi na bugawa, gumi na karyo mishi, ya rasa ma zafi yake ji ko sanyi, daga inda tace ance sai ta kawo sperm dinsa.… baki daya jikinshi kyarma ya shiga yi har tukin ya soma kokarin gagararsa. Kafin ta kai aya daidai inda tace ance sai Tsimbirbira ya sadu da ita zata haihu, Zayyan bai tsaya yaji karshen ba ya daka mata tsawa jikinsa na zikiri, yace “bana son jin labarin, bana son ji, please ya isheni haka!!!” Ya fada cikin tsawar data kada ‘yan hanjinta, kafin ya gangara motar gefen titi a hankali ya kasheta gabadaya, don tsoron kada ya kifar dasu. Ya fara ambaton “Innalillahi wa inna ilaihi rajioun”. Ya kura mata ido cikin mamaki da tsoro da tarin disappointment a cikin kallon dake fitowa daga idonsa. Yace. “Safiyyah!” (Sunanda tun suna dating wato tun kafin aure rabon shi da kiranta da shi), kafin ta farfado daga wannan shock din na kiran asalin sunanta yace. “Kinci amana Sophie, kinci amanar aure, me ya kaiki binta in the first place? Gaskiya kinci amanar tarbiyyar da Malam da Ammi suka yi miki yau. Ya buga sityarin da karfi yana fadin “Ni Zayyan kika yiwa haka Safiyyah yau? I can’t believe it!”. Ya ma rasa me zai ce da ita, saboda tsabar kaduwa. Sophien shi wani ya kusa ketawa rigar mutumci da aurensa saboda son zuciyarta. Ya sake maimaita “Innalillahi wa inna ilaihi rajiun”. Zayyan ya dade bai shiga tashin hankali irin wannan ba. Yace. “Safiyyah why? Don me kika je? Ko saboda rashin godiyar Allah? In ba haka ba ni Zayyan na taba nuna miki wani abu da ya nuna na damu da haihuwa ko rashinta? Ko na taba matsanta miki akan inason haihuwa da har yasa kika kusa jefa kanki a fushin Allah saboda son wata haihuwa da ni bata gabana, wannan rashin tawakkali har ina?” Sai taji kaman saukar aradu akanta. Tayi suman zaune ta kasa cewa komai, domin ya dauki al’amarin da girma har fiyeda yadda ta zaci zai dauka. Shi gani yake ma kamar Tsimbirbirar ya keta masa haddi sakayawa kawai tayi a gaban idonsa. Wannan tashin hankalin da Safiyyah ta gani a tare dashi yasa ta kasa cigaba da kuka, don ta san duk abunda ya gaya mata ta cancanci ya gaya mata ko don ya huce bacin ransa. Sai ya koma magana cikin rauni. Yace “Safiyyah Allah shaida na ne kan na soki da zuciya daya, rashin haihuwa bai taba sawa na rageki da komai ba, shi ne zaki saka mun da wannan butulcin, ki kai kanki ga wani zindiqi mushriki, kin butulcemin, kin butulcewa Allah, kaicon ki da rashin tawakkali Safiyyah”. Ya ja motar a hankali kamar wanda kwai ya fashewa a ciki suka cigaba da tafiya. Har suka shiga Abuja bai kara ce mata ko uffan ba. Kuka Safiyyah ta yi shi har ta ji babu dadi. Kamar hawayenta zasu kare. Taimakon Allah kadai yasa ya iya karasa tukinnan, ya kuma kawo su gida lafiya. Yana fita daga motar ta biyoshi da sauri tana bashi hakuri, zata rike hannunsa yace “idan kika tabani wallahi zan bata miki rai, sai kinyi dana sanin zuwa kusa dani”. Ya shige ciki ya barta a wurin. Nan Safiyyah ta zauna a kasa a harabar gidansu a salube, don kafarta ta kasa daukan nauyinta. Ba jimawa da shigarsa ya sake turo kofa ya fito ya fice, bata san ma inda ya nufa ba. Zayyan dai tun daga ranar ya canzawa Safiyyah, wato ya dauke mata wuta, suka koma zaman marina ko zaman doya da manja shi da ita, baya shiga harkarta, baya kulata a shimfida, punishment sosai yake mata, amma in ta gaishe shi zai amsa yana cigaba da tafiya. A lokacin ya maida kanshi wani irin busy machine saboda aiki, dare da rana zane yakeyi, yana baiwa kanshi wahala yana ta zane-zane ba gajiyawa, in ya fita harkar neman kwangilarsa ma sai can dare yake dawowa. Safiyya duk ta sha jinin jikinta cewa Zayyan yana zargin Tsimbirbira ya riga ya cika burinsa a kanta, ta dai boye masa ne, don haka gabadaya Sophie ta tsangwami kanta, ta tsani kanta, ta rame ta zuge cikin kwana uku, ta tsani haihuwar bakidaya ma. Gashi ba halin ta kira kowa ta nemi shawara, don tamkar ta yi kirari ta dabawa kanta wuka ne a ciki. Musamman Ammi da Malam, da tsine mata ne kadai bazasu yi ba in suka ji abinda ta aikata saboda son haihuwa. Ta yi istigfar ta nemi gafarar Ubangiji yafi sau shurin masaki. Tace koda wannan punishment din na duniya Zayyan ya barta ya isheta kankarar zunubinta. Yau dai Safiyyah ta kasa jurewa, Zayyan barin rayuwarta ne da bazata iya rayuwa babu shi ba, duk ta rame ta zaftare ta dawo rabi, dama jikinta ba wani jiki bane na azo a gani, gainin zata mutu a daki da damuwa sai ta tunkareshi yau, ta same shi a master bedroom dinsu yana changing zai shiga wanka. Safiyyah ta tsugunna a gabansa hawaye na tsiyaya a idonta, tace “wajenka nazo Habiby, zan yi karin bayani, koda bazaka yarda dani ba, na rantse maka da Allah asibitin mata ne kawai naje a Kano don a duba lafiyata, a ganomin me ya hanani haihuwa. Don na kasa gamsuwa da binciken wannan Dr. Muwadda din, don ni dai ban taba jin wani abu wai shi (pcos) a dangina na uwa ko na uba ba. Nayi tunanin in nace maka daga gidan Anti Dije zan je Kano asibiti again bazaka barni ba, musamman da yake kace kar na kara yi maka zancen komawa asibiti, which I find it difficult to obey (wanda na samu kaina da kasa bin umarnin)”. Nan ma shiru, Zayyan baice komai ba, kokarin zagayeta yake ya wuce toilet ta sake shan gabansa, ta rungume shi tsamtsam tana hawaye “tace don Allah kayi hakuri ka yafeni Habiby, I can’t actually explain exactly what happened to me that day… (bazan iya fassara hakikanin abinda ya faru dani a ranar ba) amma abun yafi kama da toshewar basira ….!”. Ya dago manyan idanunsa da nan da nan suka kada ya dubeta, saida hantar cikin Sophie ta kada, har ‘yan hanjinta saida suka hautsina da ganin bacin ran dake kwance cikin idanunsa, yace. “Safiyyah kece kuwa? Is it really my Sophie? Haihuwar da dole ake samunta